The Healing Resort

2. What the heck does it mean to communicate anyway? 

Most of the time relationship problems are not created by a lack of communication, but by communication that is more damaging than it is beneficial. Couples most often are in need of a “new, more positive” way to communicate. Most relationship problems stem from couples continuing to communicate in ways that push each other away, hurt one another’s feelings, demean or belittle one another, frustrate and enrage one another, instead of bringing them closer together.

 

When you stay at the Relationship Help Resort, you remove yourself from your normal environment. In this way, you give yourselves a fabulous luxury weekend to learn a new way to communicate by understanding your personality tendencies and appreciating what each of you bring to your relationship. How can you expect to communicate lovingly and effectively if you don’t even understand the principles behind great communication. The goal is to “communicate where each partner feels heard and understood." It is only then that  you can begin to get to the root of problems.

 

3. There is no ‘magic pill’ that fixes relationships.

Many issues that bring couples to to their knees are not easily fixed with a magic pill. Healing requires time, effort, heart, compassion and dedication. If betrayal is an issue, your families are experiencing problems, you don’t see eye-to-eye on parenting styles, or your anger has stolen your feelings of passion, you can’t heal these issues overnight. But you can begin the healing process. Understand that healing is a process, and a very natural one at that. The good news is that human beings are made to heal. It is one of the miracles of being human. We fall down, break a bone, burn our hand on the stove, cut ourselves with a knife, our bodies are made to begin the healing process. It is in the process that we rebuild even stronger from whatever the break. A couples luxury healing retreat can help you begin the powerful process of healing instead of staying stuck in the cycle of re-inflicting, or enflaming old relational wounds.

 

4. WHY we don’t spend most of our time on the “why” of issues.

Instead of focusing all of our time and energy on “Why do you always do this, why he never does that? At the Relationship Help Resort couples retreat we also focus on heavily on the “HOW & WHAT”. How do you communicate in a way that strengthens your bond and helps you genuinely love and understand one another?” “What are the steps to healing the broken pieces of your hearts?”

Often, couples get stuck in their desire to ‘be right’. They want to tell their side of a story over and over, placing blame and fault where they believe it belongs. In my experience as a couple’s coach and counselor I have found that there is always enough fault to go around and that it is easy to sink into the pit of despair of past hurts. Instead at the Relationship Help Resort couples retreat we spend most of the time working out a step-by-step plan for the future, rather than continuing to dunk one another in the quicksand created by the pain of the past.  That is why we begin with a fun and interesting new way to see yourselves and those you want to love before we launch into already chewed up narratives that bring you nothing but sadness, frustration and anger.

 

5. You won’t emerge from your couple’s retreat with a perfect union.

Perfection doesn’t exist; life is real and full of inherent challenges. Nothing and no one can make your life or your relationship a ‘bed of rose petals’. Even beautiful roses have thorns. The secret to creating a great relationship is learning how to move together through the inevitable ups and downs of life. There are seasons in a relationship and just like the weather, you must know how to appropriately prepare for the cold Winter moments, as well as effortlessly enjoying the beautiful Spring moments.

 

6. Like all successful games, love has rules.

The rules of love are not there to hinder, burden, or restrict love, they are there to protect,

strengthen and encourage love. Both people in a relationship fare far better when they

know the rules of a game and what actions cause you to win, and what actions are

responsible for losing. At the Relationship Help Resort couple’s retreat there are loving,
respectful and protective ground rules. They are the same rules that protect and strengthen

the relationship after the retreat experience. For example, at the Healing Resort  you find

a safe haven where you are not allowed to physically attack anyone, or even hurt each other

with words. The retreat is not a place where people and relationships are torn apart, but

where they are carefully, lovingly and respectfully woven back together. 

 

7. Are you doomed if all you do is argue?

No. Couples who are flat and unresponsive and apathetic probably have already given up. If you are arguing, it is the perfect time to seek out a wonderful couples retreat to help you direct that passion in a healthier and more healing way. Realize that if the two of you are still engaged with each other—even if engagement is defined by frustration, confusion, yelling and possible even name calling—you have a real chance (if you want to take advantage of it) to save your marriage.

 

8. There’s not one, ideal form of couple’s therapy.

Couples counselors come in every gender, every color, from many different schools of thought and with many different approaches. When you are talking about healing a marriage, or strengthening a relationship, one-size does not fit all. That is why the Relationship Help Resort couple's retreat focuses on each unique personality blend and how those personality blends might fit best together. If you have experienced traditional therapy, this is not it. I spent many years in the chair doing traditional work and can tell you that a couple's intensive retreat is so much more powerful, effective, lasting and life-changing. That is why I am spending my last and best years of my life focused on doing them. They work.

Choose to experience The Relationship Help Healing Resort:  As you consider traditional “couples therapy”, and certainly before you end a marriage and tear a family apart; before you give in to your hopelessness, anger, frustration and rage look into the luxury vacation that can transform your relationships. Oh, and did I mention our Relationship Intensives are guaranteed. If you attend an intensive and do not believe  you truly received extraordinary new insights about yourself and others in your life, I will happily refund half of your money. The good news is, that has never happened.